An Hour to Live, An Hour to Love

An Hour to Live, An Hour to Love

Sr Patricia Michelle Mathias fsp

The writer belongs to the congregation of the Daughters of St Paul (media-missionaries), popularly known as Pauline Sisters. She holds a Masters degree in Communications and is currently a lecturer in NISCORT MEDIA COLLEGE.

Once in a while it happens that unknowingly a treasure that falls into your hands influences you, challenges you and changes your perspective towards life. One such treasure was a book sent to me by one of my friends when the person found me running endlessly with no time to spare. This little treasure was titled, ‘An Hour to Live, An Hour to Love’ by Richard and Kristine Carlson. I wish to share in a nutshell this treasure with you.

This little treasure enumerates the thoughts that Richard had when he knew his life was ebbing away and his journey on earth was ending. He reminisces over his past life and realises that all that he fretted over and was worked up about were actually trivial matters of least importance. What he actually treasures is the time he spent with his wife and his daughters. He leaves you with a question, “If you had an hour to live, and you had to inform that one person in your life, who would that person be?” Indeed...my dear friends reading this article, ask this question to yourself, it makes a difference. You have one call to make, who would it be? Who is the most precious one to you?

Richard beautifully explains in his book, “If I had an hour to live, I’ll tell you who I wouldn’t call. It wouldn’t be my stockbroker, my financial planner, my banker, or my CPA. Don’t get me wrong. They are all great people, but the last thing on my mind would be how much money I had made during my lifetime or, for that matter, how much I had left.”  

He further explains, “We spend so much of our lives collecting achievements and then identifying ourselves with them, Yet, with an hour to live, those achievements don’t seem very relevant. I wouldn’t be looking at my trophies.”

Richard further highlights what he treasured most was the time he spent with his family- his wife and his darling daughters. He says the last call would be inevitably to his beloved wife, who stood by him through thick and thin and loved him unconditionally accepting him as he was.

While, reading this book, I had my own anxieties as I was going through a conflict with someone who happened to be a very close friend of mine. The conflict was such that it was gnawing me from within. I realised, that ultimately, whether the other person or me, our egos would take us nowhere. We have a tini-mini life and that life had to made worth living. And if it were not filled with love, then a life where there was a pile of worldly accomplishments, work, satisfaction, etc, would be meaningless. Thanks to Richard, I felt like, reconciliation was required. My perspective changed. I felt so relaxed. I did reconcile. I knew humbling myself and reconciling with the other would only bring me peace and make life better for me and for the other as well.

Richard Karlson told his wife, “If I could live my life over, I’d be more loving to you and to everyone else as well-and I’d expect far less in return. I see now that life is all about love, sharing, compassion and kindness.” Mother Teresa once said, ‘We cannot do great things on this earth. We can only do small things with great love.’ Towards the end of his life Richard realised how life should be lived.

The daily grinding for job, security, insurance bills, etc, are part of life but let that not become a reason for you to avoid your family. Let not your property or your greed for money and power rob you of the bliss that a life ‘lived in love’ brings. 

Let your work not become a reason for you to not have time to say those three magical words, 'I Love You', to your parents, to your brothers and sisters, to your wife/ husband, to your kids or for that matter even if you are a Religious Nun or priest...say it to your community members. It may sound funny, but love is contagious. Expressions of love, a kind deed, an assuring smile, a warm hug, a debt forgiven spreads love. If a life is lived well, then even towards the end we will not make hasty decisions, we will depart in a spirit of love that emanates from us to those around.

So then, if you had just an hour to live, who would you call and what would you do?